Kids Toys Worth Checking Out

I've discovered a brand of toys that I want to have all of and gift to every kid I know. The brand is B. Short for "Just B. Just You. B. You," these toys are available at Target and other retailers.
The packaging caught my eye first. Upon further inspection, I realized the packaging is multi-functional. It is both made of recycled materials and is recyclable, but is also biodegradable. The bags that some toys, including One Two Squeeze and Elemenosqueeze, come in is meant to be kept and reused. I will definitely reuse mine.
Another great thing about this toy company is that a portion of every purchase price is donated to FREE THE CHILDREN, a charity devoted to helping "free children from poverty and exploitation and free young people from the notion that they are powerless to affect positive change." How great is that?!?!
The first B toy I bought was the Wheee-mote control car for a little boy's 1st birthday and the packaging actually turned inside out to create a gift-wrapped box. I thought it was the coolest thing and I was hooked. The other day, when shopping for Amelia's newest toy, I landed on the One Two Squeeze blocks, and she loves them. I intend on buying a variety of these toys for her as she gets bigger and sharing our love for this toy brand with our friends and their kids.
Instead of me spewing out all the information I've discovered about B toys, I'll let you read about the company and its toys. I cannot do it justice and I'm okay admitting it. =) Go here to check it out.

Letting the Light Shine in

Hormones were raging, irritability and moodiness were at an all time high. I had no desire to go anywhere or see anyone. Being in my bed, alone, in the dark, was where I wanted to be. If I didn't have Amelia, I'd of done exactly that everyday. I started fights about nothing for no reason. I had attitude all the time. I was not happy with anything and I thought I was the most horrible mom. I went in search of answers because I knew these feelings weren't normal. I mean, I have so much to be happy and thankful for, yet those were not the emotions I had.....ever.
I looked up postpartum depression, thinking some of my symptoms probably lined up with that diagnosis; however, Amelia was nearly 4 months old and I figured PPD would be obvious from the moment she was born. My gut was right, but I hated to admit it. I was ecstatic that I had found the answer, but almost ashamed that it was postpartum depression. At first I didn't want to tell anyone and only told my mom, my husband, and 1 friend. I felt like it meant I couldn't handle being a mom, but I wouldn't want to be anything else. Talking about it helped immensely. Reading about what I could do to treat it without going on medication made me feel better too. Simple things like opening the blinds and letting the light shine in, spending time with friends, asking for help when I need it, decreasing caffeine intake, being outdoors and staying active have worked well so far. Although I still have my bad days, probably due to my inability to cut out caffeine completely, I get through them. I realize I'm human. And thanks to talking to my friends, I realized I'm not alone. It's way more common than I ever thought and that makes me feel better too.

And we're in!

Holy cow, what a process! Buying a house is a lot of work. We closed yesterday, coincidentally on the day Amelia turned 4 months old. What a way to celebrate...giving our baby girl a new place to live, a bigger place to crawl around when the time comes. As we walked out of the title company, we were both in disbelief, but excited beyond words. We were officially homeowners, and what a feeling that is. We drove straight to the house and pulled into OUR driveway, put the key in OUR lock, and stepped into OUR home for the very first time. We walked through the whole place, reveling at the fact that we could do what we wanted with every wall, every room, and every crevice. I was making mental notes of the work that needed to be done asap and another list of things I want to see done at some point. The yard needs major help. I swear there is a weed as tall as me growing by our back deck. On the inside, we have more rooms to paint than I originally thought. Luckily, the only room that needs immediate attention is Amelia's. Seafoam green doesn't exactly go with the decor of her nursery. Pink is a nice color for all things Amelia, but the master bath is not a place for such a shade. One day we'll get to that and the other random things we want to change, fix, or improve.
Today, after giving a tour of our house to a friend, I stood there, in the stillness of an empty hallway, breathless. Almost in tears, I thanked God for our home, for nothing we have would be possible without Him. Our life has changed forever. Everything has a more positive spin on it, simply because we were blessed with this house. Yeah, we have a mortgage and all the other bills that come with owning a home, but it excites me, no....it inspires me. Hard things suddenly seem easier. Rough spots feel smoother. Life is splendid.
Thank you, God, for our home and the new adventure it brings.

My Life in Boxes

Boxes. They are everywhere, walls of them, filled with our life. It feels like there is still so much to pack, but I only have so much time. I try to take advantage of the times when Amelia sleeps, but she's doesn't always nap for extended periods of time, and I don't always feel up for packing every time she's asleep. So, here we are, 5 days away from our anticipated closing date, and I feel less than prepared to move. We are wanting to close early, actually this Friday, because weekends are better suited for big moves than Monday evenings. We are waiting on the bank to finish up the final underwriting and who knows if it'll be done in 3 days. We can hope!

A Tutu for Amelia

A few of my friends have made tutus for their daughters in the last few months and they always turned out so cute. So last night, I made one for Amelia. Its made of tulle in 3 colors and I think it turned out great! I tried it on her this morning before Matt went to work and took a few pictures. For now, it swallows her up and it looks like she's sitting on a huge pile of tulle, but it will make for some very cute professional pictures soon enough!! She's getting soooo big!

I'll post more pictures when Amelia actually fits in her tutu.

Next Step on the Road to Home Ownership

There is so much more involved in buying a house than I ever thought. We had the inspection, which for the most part showed minor home improvement sorts of things, but we opted for the radon test as well. It showed the presence of higher than normal radon in the basement over the duration of nearly 3 days. Just when you think you're past the hurdles, there are more. We had to decide if it was something we were willing to pay for if the current owners would not. Lucky for us, they said they'd fix it, so by closing, we'll have a fan system installed in the basement to push any radon right out.
All the paperwork was signed to get our financing underway and were told the next step would be to get homeowners insurance. I called a couple places yesterday in search of the best deal. If it means leaving State Farm, we will.
Oh my gosh, I'm so excited to move. I honestly feel like this apartment dampers my spirits. We felt cramped here long before we ever had Amelia. Her birth just made it that much more obvious that, house or not, we needed to find a bigger place, a place to start fresh. Even though packing and moving is a lot of work, I've always enjoyed "starting over." Even rearranging furniture creates a new atmosphere for me, so the impending opportunity to put furniture in new rooms, decorate new walls, paint, and buy new furnishings is an overwhelmingly pleasant thought. I can't wait to get out of here and have a new beginning in our first house. Yay!

Army-Bound Twins

Last year, Matt's twin brothers shared the news that they were joining the army. It has been a long time coming. Since high school, it was something they felt a calling to do, but they took different paths first. They are both firefighters, Mark is a paramedic, and Mike is an EMT. They are two of the most selfless guys I know, always giving of themselves to make sure everyone else is happy. They'd give you the shirts off their backs if they thought you needed them. When they told us of their plans, Matt and I were so happy for them; however, it wasn't something that excited every member of our family. Its understandable though...we are at war and joining the army when you'll actually have to 'fight for our country' instead of being safe on U.S. soil doesn't set well with anyone. But I couldn't be more proud to call 2 people my brothers. Even knowing they will be sent across the world to fight for people they don't even know, they want to go...they HAVE to go. The drive to do this has never left. They are following their hearts and doing what they feel they've been put on this earth to do. And if it wasn't enough to join the army, their goal is actually to be Special Forces and I know that they'll make it.

It dawned on me the other day that I'm gonna miss the heck out of those guys. We don't see them as often as we'd like because we don't live in the same city or state, but any time we are together is always a good time. I was told recently that they said Amelia is the only reason they don't want to go, but is also the main reason they are going. They want to make this world a better place for her to grow up in. How sweet is that?!?!

They leave March 17th, on St. Patricks Day. I will look forward to traveling to Atlanta this summer so we can watch them graduate from boot camp and see them off on the next leg of their amazing journey with the United States Army.

(The photo above is from a party that their cousin, Lauren, also pictured, planned for them. The entire Fiocca family and a ton of friends came to show their support.)

Why James, you ask...

No, it was not a typo. Yes, you heard it right. Amelia's middle name is James. You should see the looks I get when I tell people her name. Sometimes, before they even ask, "Wait. What? James?" or have time to think I'm crazy, I just start into the story of where I got it. She was named after a very dear friend of mine. I met Jamie, or for short, James, in middle school and we were fast friends. (Actually, we went to preschool together, but I only discovered that in high school when I found a class photo from way back when.) We hung out all the time. She was so quiet, but the friendliest person you'd ever meet. She could always make me laugh. She was gorgeous, but never knew it. She had more emotional strength than anyone should ever have to have. She had the biggest heart and so much compassion for people with disabilities. She would help anyone who needed it. She had a beautiful soul. Jamie loved her family, friends, and God. She was my very best friend.
Sadly, Jamie was killed in a car accident November 6th, 1998. After having time to deal with this tragedy, it dawned on me that I could help her memory live on forever. I would name my first daughter after her. It was the least I could do for such an amazing person and friend. I can't wait to tell Amelia all about her. If she grows up to be even remotely like Jamie, I'll consider myself blessed!

A New Dwelling

Realizing we would need more space with the impending birth of our daughter, we started our house hunt last summer. When we got word of possible instability at Matt's work, we decided it was best to end our search without buying anything. Losing his job did not happen. So with this new year came a new search for a bigger place. We looked at around 15 houses this time before finding a few we really liked. Taking a second look at them with the help of my family, we made an offer on one not too far from our apartment. After a couple counter-offers, we got it and we are beyond excited! Whats funny is that its on the same street that we currently live on, just at the other end. We are set to close at the end of March, but have lots to do between now and then. The inspection is done and went well. Next step, finish financing and get the appraisal. Then we wait. Meanwhile, I'm making lists of what I want to do in the house, where furniture should go, what colors to paint the few rooms that need new coats, and what we need to buy for it. Ahhh! I can't wait to move in and make that house a home!

The Newest Addition

12 weeks ago, our lives changed forever. Our precious baby girl was born. On November 29th, at 9:57 in the morning, Amelia James made her debut. 23 hours of labor and I'd do it all over again in a heartbeat. She is absolutely beautiful and quite the handful. She is so much like me, temper and all. Everyday is a ball of emotions, even still. Being a mom is such a hard job, much harder than I ever imagined. I lived the first few weeks of Amelia's life in an exhausted haze and swore I'd give up breastfeeding at least a hundred times. Leaping into motherhood has proved to be the biggest adjustment in my life so far. We are learning this gig together and what a journey it has been. It has its ups and downs for sure, but no matter what, when I see her smile, my heart melts. I thank God that when the timing was right for us to have a baby, the timing was also right for a bunch of friends to have babies as well. Trekking this new terrain alone would be so, so hard, but as it turned out, we had 1 of the 10 babies due at our church last year.
Presently, we live in a 2-bedroom apartment. It's not tiny, but its certainly not big enough to fit all that comes with bringing home a baby. Our living room is stuffed full with our regular furniture, but a baby swing, her bouncy seat, a changing station, and toys galore have been added to the mix. There's barely room to walk in this place. Her nursery is just as full and what's funny is that there is still more stuff, unopened and stacked in her room, and at my parents' house. It's crazy how much stuff a baby requires, but I wouldn't change the crowded nature of our apartment for the world. I can't wait to see her grow and change, which I know happens all too quickly. Before I know it, this nearly 3-month old will be 3-years old. I'm gonna enjoy every moment!

Did I forget to dream?

It feels like yesterday I was cartwheeling around my backyard without a worry in the world. I woke up everyday with the excitement of knowing I got to run around with my friends and do all sorts of kid things. Wow, does time fly and boy, does the world get more complicated as the years go by. I remember dreaming of being a "pay-for girl" when I was little. No, I didn't want to be a prostitute. I wanted to be a cashier. Whenever possible, I'd stand by the cashiers as they rang us up, in the hopes that they'd let me push some buttons on the register. I'd use our home computer as a register and the desk as the conveyer belt. I was so fascinated with calculators that had the print option that I asked for and got one for a birthday as a child. I think I would've preferred an actual cash register, but we can't have everything. =)

Oh, how simple my dreams use to be. With age, dreams should get bigger and better, but I'm beginning to think that I forgot to dream along the way. Quite awhile ago, in church, we were charged with the task of creating a list of the dreams we want to see fulfilled before we die. When I attempted it, I was stumped. Stumped. How is that possible? When did I stop dreaming about the things I want to accomplish in this life? I couldn't think of more than a few and even those felt made up. I mean, yes, I wanted to graduate college, get married, and have a family, but past that, I drew a blank. What was I put on this earth to do? What is my destiny?

I know God puts people in our lives that we can learn from and admire, share our dreams with and love. That is my husband. Matt has no shortage of dreams. Sometimes I think he has enough for both of us. I swear he comes up with new ones everyday and they aren't usually small. He dreams BIG and I admire that quality in him. To him, anything is possible. Anything. If he wrote out his list of dreams, it would be forever long. He's known since birth what he was created for and he's doing it. Gosh, I wish I was like that.

What are your dreams? What "job" would you do for free, if given the opportunity? I encourage you to think about these questions, write down your list of dreams, and strive to make them happen.